Friday, June 26, 2009
What an emotional two days....ups and downs...lots of them. I am very tired this Friday evening...but writing will welcome sleep...and so I write. My mom's best friend called me today to tell me all the things she thinks I should be doing with my parents in the face of this disease that is taking my dad. Financial management, care management, family meetings, planning ahead, mental health counseling, etc. The list went on and on. "You are the oldest Kim, this is what life brings, you know that. You have to face it younger than most. But you still have to do it." I am caught between being the daughter and being the i don't know what- what am I exactly? Information gatherer? Resource planner? It is hard to have compassion for her when she is so angry- when I am so angry about the disease that is taking my dad- that is changing him. I want to write- and help people understand that there is no understanding for this process- it is just that- a process- of watching the person you love slip away- slip into this land where you don't even know where they are- where they don't know where they are. Yesterday I followed a man over to Bimart in his scooter- and me in my car, because he was not safe to go on his own- and when he got there all he wanted to do was pick out a 25 year anniversary present for his wife- so there we stood in the aisle- me helping him pick out a pink t-shirt and shorts, and pink flip flops to match. And then a romantic card, one that played music- and to top it all off some ice cream drumsticks for the staff. He asked if I liked drumsticks and wanted me to have one. And then I followed him back to the nursing home- me in my car- him in his scooter. Being with him in Bimart made me remember why it is I do what I do- a small experience of helping someone else complete their wish for the day. There are many tears in my family lately- my mom cries a lot- I hear her- and want to curl her up and hold her.....and yet she is my mom- and it's not supposed to be like this. All these independent spirits and they are being swallowed up by various diseases. So tonight I sleep to have rest- and to start tomorrow new- without all this complication.
Saturday, June 20, 2009
Well Kula should have no trouble at all recovering with all this attention!! A friend of mine sent her a deer antler and a get well card...and our neighbors made her a special get well cake!!!!!!! Which she proceeded to gobble half in about 20 seconds- and would have eaten the whole thing if I had let her. While she has been resting I have been very creative and productive- I have created a shop on Etsy.com to sell my handspun yarn...so check it out at www.kulascolors.etsy.com, signed up to sell natural pet products with Shurepets, and am baking homemade dog biscuits for the rest of the day. Hm......the stars must be aligned in the domestic area today!!!! Now on to the baking!
Thursday, June 18, 2009
Kula came home this morning....she has slept literally all day in Bruce's office. I went off to work after we got her settled in at home- and the only time she got up was when I came home from work when she got up and walked 5 feet to greet me. She seems so tired, and content to just be home. The cutest part is Symeon...our Bengal cat, who is literally holding vigil outside the office door- peeking in through the glass every few minutes to check on her, as if to say, "I'm here, girl, I've got your back." We'll see about that tonight as the witching hour of 3 am draws near, and the little spotted monster flys around the house obeying some archaic nighttime cat god, like clockwork!! I'm happy Kula's home, now for the recovery. I've taken tomorrow off to hang out at home with her- we'll knit and read and be lazy together. Ahh.....now why does it take my dog having bilateral knee surgery to get me to take a day off????? That folks, is the quality of life question of the night. :)
p.s. This pic is from when she was a puppy- however the scene now is the same, without the crate, and one more thing....the dog is twice the size of the cat. That's in body only though. :)
Tuesday, June 16, 2009
"Wouldn't trade her for the world"
June 16th, 2009
My dog is a lemon....an amazing little lemon. I swear she is on her fourth life. I wonder how many dogs have.....first there was the parvo...and then there was the near death by asthma inhaler ingestion, and now today there is medial patella luxation surgery...on both of her little knees.....amazing I tell you. The vet last night said, "I hope you're not a lemon..shoud we call you lemon? You are yellow.....She was playing last week out in the yard at work, and the mama cat got the best of her. Callie was protecting her 7 week old kittens, and Kula just wanted to be friends like she does to everything..and they got into a tussel that Callie won- Kula turned and hurt her knee- and has been three legging it on pain meds the past 5 days. So today she had surgery and they fixed her little rotated kneecaps...all back in their right places. And I have learned more about dog leg anatomy in the last five days then I ever thought I would! Medecine is amazing...now for that second job! :)